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Pitomio Bandas Manic of the Workers' Dawn of Healthy Imprudence: Eradicate inadaptability from the EU!

Czech Republic, European Union, 8.5.2014 0:35, (ROMEA)
Pitomio Bandas Manic and some of his friends. (Photo: The Cloudy to Overcast Agency)
Pitomio Bandas Manic and some of his friends. (Photo: The Cloudy to Overcast Agency)

Pitomio Bandas Manic, the chair of the Workers' Dawn of Healthy Imprudence (Dělnický úsvit zdravého nerozumu - DÚZN), who is its leading candidate for the EP race, would like to enforce the abolition of the European Union. Before he succeeds with that, he will fight for reduced unemployment and restrictions on immigration.

Mr Manic also wants to "wipe the inadaptability of some inhabitants off of the social map". "Decent people must win by a landslide, and the indecent have no right to prevent them from enjoying their fundamental human right to win. In cases where an adaptable, decent person is also poor, the same applies - as long as he agrees to fight against the existing establishment," Manic said.

One reason the movement is fielding candidates is that Members of the European Parliament make really good money, and the movement says any MEPs elected for DÚZN will use some of their earnings to finance a foundation. "The foundation will address poor people," said Pitomio Bandas Manic in this interview for news servers Deníkreferendum.cz and Romea.cz.  

Q:  Mr Manic, you want to abolish the European Union. What are your reasons for doing so?

A:  Essentially it is a bureaucratic, communist, dangerous machine that plays to the interests of those who control and manage our world, but what I really want to explain are those allegations that I stole CZK 3 million from our movement...

Q:  We'll get to that. First I would like an answer to my question. How, specifically, is the EU bureaucratic?

A:  That shows up most of all in their directives, the ones where they banned, for example, the phrase "butter spread". Why should anyone ban such a thing? We should let folks call stuff whatever they want. I'm also pissed off about the ban on light bulbs. We have to use these environmentally-friendly ones now, and the light from them in a room is like being in some sort of cave. Now, I want to assure everyone that I never stole...

Q:  So you want to abolish the EU because of butter spread and light bulbs?

A:  Yes! Or no, no... not just because of them. The EU creates an unfair welfare state and we want to bring it to justice. The social welfare system today privileges the inadaptables, while the decent people come up short. Nothing should be given to the inadaptables until they adapt. We will give them opportunities for re-education in permanent concentration facilities financed by the EU budget. These won't be labor camps, as all those pseudo-humanists and "truth-lovers" call them, but we won't deny that 12-hour workdays in the uranium mines will be the main component of that re-education.

Q:  Where will you put their children?

A:  No one wants inadaptable children, so they will be in the mines too. However, we are humane, their workday will only be eight hours long. Now, if I hear one more lie about my having stolen...

Q:  So your main trump card in your crusade for a more just welfare state is a "non-labor" camp where people will do hard labor for 12 hours in the uranium mines? Or do you have any other solutions for the social situation?

A:  Well, we will add the immigrants to the inadaptables - that is, if we don't succeed in immediately turning around their launches and rafts while they're still out in the Mediterranean. Foreigners comprise too cheap of a labor force and take jobs away from our guys. We stand for the kind of work being done by the foreigners today, like picking up dog shit and garbage by hand for CZK 30 an hour. Even the "upper 10 000" in our society are very badly off now because of the EU. Some have even begun to steal... although that concerns all those political dinosaurs, not the members of our movement. I, for example, have never...

Q:  So, you want to achieve an increase in the standard of living, and a reduction in unemployment, by "eradicating the immigrants and inadaptables", as your program puts it. Do you have any other specific proposals for fulfilling that point of your election program?

A:  Well, I dunno, I don't have any numbers here, but once I have them I will know. I'm good at counting.

Q:  Your program mentions it, so you must have some idea?

A:  Yes:  We also want to radically reduce VAT on rubber duckies, the ones infants play with in the bath. I am outraged that the EU has bureaucratically, carelessly afflicted the families of those little children with such an un-Christian tax. I am also outraged that someone is spreading the rumor that I...

Q:  We'll get to that. What would you consider success for your party in these elections, how many MEPs do you hope for?

A:  My favorite number is three. We will, therefore, be glad if we get all three thirds of our single candidate into the EP.

Q:  A Deutsche Bank study was released at the end of March that claims your movement, the Workers' Dawn of Healthy Imprudence, falls among eurosceptic parties in the same category as the Czech right-wing extremist Workers' Social Justice Party (DSSS), the neo-Nazi Golden Dawn party in Greece, and Jobbik, a Fascist party in Hungary. What do you say to that?

A:  Wow, I didn't know that. Thanks a bunch! That's the best news I've had in a long time!

Q:  Seriously, it doesn't bother you to be linked, for example, with the DSSS?

A:  That party is, in any event, a legitimate political entity, registered with the Interior Ministry, and meeting the legal condition that its program not contravene the Charter of Fundamental Rights and Freedoms and that it not promote violence against groups or individuals. You say it's extremist, but how is it really? Why, for example, is it extreme to hold the opinion that gypsies should establish their own state and that the Czech Republic should support their emigration to the country of their ancestors? 

Q:  Maybe because they don't want to move?

A:  But they do! They keep emigrating to Canada and England from here all the time!

Q:  Only some are leaving, a very small percentage. You, of course, would like to evacuate them all. Many of them are afraid, or they have had enough of the discrimination, the lack of equal opportunities, the racist displays and the violence committed by various extremists. Isn't that the main reason they emigrate?

A:  Discrimination and racism do not exist here, that's just the babbling of those lunatic pseudo-humanists and "truth-lovers". What does exist here is laziness and violence - and both are congenital to the gypsies.

Q:  What do you say to the salaries paid to MEPs? Someone in that office can earn up to CZK 800 000 a year.

A:  We welcome the level of those salaries. We are establishing a foundation, and all of our MEPs will contribute 3 % of their salaries to it. The foundation will then distribute the money in various forms to the adaptable, decent, poor people in need. That, too, is why I call on all decent people to vote for us and not to believe the rumors about me...

Q:  How will your foundation identify these people in need?

A:  We will start with the former functionaries of our movement, whose pensions make it impossible for them to lead a dignified life. The poorest only make around CZK 30 000 a month, and as you yourself know, it's hard to live on so little. I myself make enough money, so the rumor that I stole...

Q:  Your election program includes a crusade against political correctness. What do you mean by that?

A:  Well, you know how it is. The current establishment censors opinions dangerous to it and calls that political correctness.

Q:  I still don't completely understand. Could you give an example?

A:  So let's say I write an article in which I give my opinion - for example, that gypsies should be gassed, or that they should be kicked alive into a deep ravine - but none of the mainstream media want to publish it! As I say, the dissemination of truth today is being prevented by political correctness. 

Q:  Isn't that more like espousing hatred? Isn't that what prevents the publication of "your truth"?

A:  Me - a hater? You've confused me with someone else. I love all our adaptable, decent people. I myself am one of the decent, so of course I don't want to disseminate any hatred.

Q:  You just said some people should be gassed...

A:  Well I can have my own opinion, can't I? Why should the powerful use their political correctness to prevent me from holding my own opinion? For example, now I am of the opinion that you are preventing me from refuting the rumors about me having stolen CZK 3 million from our movement!

Q:  Ok, fine. What's your story?

A:  Well, I must say that if anyone dares spread a rumor about me stealing that money I will punch them in the face. Now that I have explained everything and corrected the record, I hope I will not find any other liars out there repeating these rumors.

Q:  At the beginning of our interview you said "someone" is controlling the world. Who do you believe that is?

A:  Now we're back to political correctness. Everyone knows who controls the world, but no one is allowed to say it.

Q:  What would happen if you were to say it?

A:  I would be labeled an anti-Semite, a racist, and a xenophobe. Those are the weapons of today's pseudo-humanists and "truth-lovers", that's how they keep political correctness going. I just want what's good for all of the adaptable, decent, good people.

Q:  I can't exactly thank you for this interview.

A:  And you can --

(In the interest of preserving political correctness, some text has been edited here.)

František Kostlán, translated by Gwendolyn Albert
Views: 344x

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Tags:  

Extremism, Humor, Politika, Volby, volby do Evropského parlamentu



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